Being Ecological – Eamon Tee

Being Ecological

My favourite podcast is about the end of the world
It’s the big new thing happening.
It is already happening.
“Aman could get used to anything if he had to”
It already happened.

That’s a line from ​I Am Legend I read.
I thought Will Smith was in it and he isn’t.
My name is not Aman…

Get it?

In the book, Vampires are a disease they catch from bats, everyone gets sick.
In the movie, Will Smith is there and there are No Bats, most of everyone gets sick.

“Aman could get used to Will Smith if he had to”
Will Smith is in it now.
He keeps killing vampires and they’re not allowed into his house. Vampires can only come inside your house if you invite them.
I didn’t like the Ending.
There’s a cum joke in there somewhere.

At the End of All Things, I think about what’s at stake… Vampires.

Get it?

My girlfriend tells me to stop thinking about never dying,
it makes her fear death and she wants to keep enjoying Season 2 Episode 13 of
Buffy the Vampire Slayer,
Killed by Death.

I hope when I’m gone, I can invite Vampires. Maybe I’ll go out into the garden and stick a stake with a picket sign that says “Vampires Welcome!”

But I’ll have to have a garden first.

What if I don’t?

What if I don’t win?
What if I go out into the garden?
What if I go out into the garden, and I don’t win?

What if I go out into the garden, and I stick a stake with a picket sign that says “Vampires Welcome!” and I stick a stake with a picket sign that says “Vampires Welcome!” and then.
The Garden.
Slowly.

Grows over me, and I am taken by the lawn and I lose the Big Game.
And when the Vampires come, they see my nice house, and think “​I want to live there” but I am gone.
Will they see my sign?

There’s a seed vault out in Svalbard.
There’s a cum joke in there somewhere.
The cum joke is in the sentence, not in Svalbard.
In Svalbard, there’s only a seed vault, and snow, and No Sun, and No People.

Do the seeds then belong to the No People in Svalbard?
When Buffy and Will Smith are dead.
When my garden is only grass and no me.
When homes are only places Vampires can’t go.
When it has been long after they crawl out of their little caves, and coffins, and Romania.
Do the seeds belong to the No People in Svalbard then?

Or do they belong to the Vampires?
When they go to Svalbard because there’s lots of No Sun there.
When they find our little seed house and crawl into the cave where we took nature.
When it’s very old and musty, and there are No Moths because they died with Buffy and Will Smith.
In the movie, Will Smith sees a butterfly and dies, because he hates nature.
When they are inside the very old and musty Svalbard and think
“More like Smellbard”?

Get it?

What if we don’t?

What if we don’t win?
What if we go out into Svalbard?
What if we go out into Svalbard, and we don’t win?
What if we go out into Svalbard, and we make a vault that says “Vampires Welcome!”
and we make a vault that says “Vampires Welcome!” and then, The End of All Things, slowly.

Grows over us, and we are taken by the Ending, and we lose.
Who owns the seeds in Svalbard then?
Are the Vampires going to

Get it?

And when the Vampires come, they see our nice little seed house, and think “​There’s a cum joke in there somewhere” but we are gone.
Will anything already happen?
Will they get used to it, if they have to?
Will they read signs?